Seriously irking English pet peeves

I am not one to generally lose my temper or easily grow annoyed or ornery, but I’m sure we can all agree that there are some pet peeves that drive us so insane we’d rather punch ourselves in the face…  or more like someone else in the face.  Or bang our heads against the wall…  Bang the steering wheel, yell like we have Tourette syndrome, or shove our fist in our mouths.  Or whatever other crazy parallel you can think of…

There are lots of pet peeves that I can list, but I generally divide the major ones into the following categories: English/Communication category, Walking/Driving Category, and the Food category.  And if you’re anything like me, the experiences encompassed by these pet peeves probably allude to some pretty humorous conversations. This blog post will discuss the English/Communication category. 

I’ve lately been finding myself correcting many of my friends on common grammar issues (I still love all of you dearly!!!) that I too often see in junior high and high school students’ English papers.  One of my best friends, Kim, told me I’m an English Nazi.    I mean, can you blame me?  I’m a secondary-Ed English major turned Communication major.  It’s in my blood.  Here are some common grammatical errors or communicative behaviors that drive me up the wall:

1.  Improper use of the words SEEN and SAW
 

Listen people.  Do you NOT remember anything from eighth grade language arts class? It’s basic grammar.   And I’m not even talking technical terms here, but think about it.  When all else fails, what sounds right in a sentence?  Apparently a lot of people think “I seen a dog” sounds better than “I saw a dog.”  Eh, wrong.  Without getting too technical or excessive, let’s review.  

“See” is obviously the present tense and shouldn’t require any further education.  “I see my dog chasing her tail” (yes, this is literally happening right this second).  Simple as that.  Any questions?  Good.  

“Saw” is used for past tense and generally follows pronouns (I, we, he, she, they, etc.), such as “I saw your friend at the game last night,” or “My grandma told me she saw your picture in the paper.”  

“Seen” is the past participle of “saw”.  All you need to know here is that it is used after verbs have, has, had, is, will be, had been, etc.  Never ever Ever say, “I seen…”  It’s always “I had seen” or “I have seen” etc.  

The same pet peeves apply for improper uses of common words such as they’re, their, and there, and then versus than.  Real quick:

They’re = They are.  “They told me they’re going to the movies tonight.”

 

Their = fricken possession.  Somebody (plural) owns something.  “I went to their house.” 

There = fricken place (consider the place is “here” with a “T” added on…)

And THEN….

Then is used for sequential purposes, such as in, “I went to the basketball game then I met my friends at the bar.” Than is used for comparison, such as “I’d rather play volleyball than softball” (true statement, by the way.)    

I really hope this clears the air. Correcting people is beginning to make me look really snobby.  And I don’t want to be a snob.  Moving on…

2. Using elitist language or technical jargon to sound “SMART”

Alright.  Listen.  Whatever industry you’re in, you’re probably in it because you’re damn good at it.  And you obviously had to learn the tricks of the trade.  So a stock broker most likely knows a whole lot more about the stock exchange and investments than (notice the emphasis here) a novice nurse.  A nurse knows a whole lot more about biology and anatomy than a teacher.  And a teacher knows a whole lot more about the No Child Left Behind Act than a student in beginning college courses.  

So, let’s not rub in everything that we know.  It doesn’t make us look “smart."  It makes us look like elitist assholes.  Every time someone throws big medical terms at me I blankly stare at them and simply request for an English translation. If I wanted to play the game, I could quite easily throw in my erudition (i.e. two cents) of a pompous, superfluous, and sesquipedalian explication of communication theory development and inquiry.  I think you get the idea...   

Simplicity is genius.  Let’s keep it that way.  

If you’ve found yourself nodding your head to the aforementioned observations, I’m sure you can agree that these are seriously irking pet peeves.  Like, nails-on-a-chalkboard annoying.  Stay tuned for more to come in my two other major pet-peeve categories, and feel free to comment below about what really pushes your buttons.

~Elizabeth 

On a Life of Endless Love

Okay, I know what some of you might be thinking…

Really, another blog post about love?  Doesn’t this chick write about anything else? I thought she was a cynic anyway??

Well, yes, lately I have been one.  But my enduring trait as a hopeless romantic far outweighs the recent experiences that have temporarily morphed me into the latter.  

Tonight I had a girls’ night out with one of my best friends, Katie, and we enjoyed a simple dinner at Panera and a chick flick afterwards: “Endless Love”

I remember admitting to her as we took our seats that I wouldn’t be surprised if this movie makes me depressed. 

“I’ve really been starting to enjoy the single life lately.  I hope this movie doesn’t ruin it for me,” I said.  

“I just hope it’s not as cheesy as it looks,” Katie responded.  

So, we found our perfect seats in the smack-dab-middle of the almost-empty theater room at MJR, kicked up our feet (because, why wouldn’t you when not one person is sitting in the 15 or so rows in front of you??) and took it all in.  

I’m not going to give a full synopsis of the movie like I often tend to do.  Just go see it, ladies—and men, if chick flicks are your thing.  Your lucky lady might appreciate it.  And, maybe you’ll learn a thing or two. 

The movie is definitely one of fantasy, because let’s face it.  Love like that just doesn’t exist anymore. 

 Okay, scratch that.  I truly believe it does.  It’s just hard to come by nowadays.  

I thought the movie was going to be really cheesy.  I mean, it’s not a Nicholas Sparks novel turned to a major motion picture.  Can anything even come close??? But, I was pleasantly surprised.  

It’s one of those types of movies that you like to get lost in and live vicariously through the characters that are so madly in love.  And for those two hours, you might be really happy, and then sad, and then start crying, and then pointing the air gun to your head because you realize your life isn’t nearly as perfect as what you’re seeing on screen, and then happy and crying all over again.  You know what I’m talking about, ladies.  

For the entire nearly-forty-minute commute home, I actually reflected upon the movie and daydreamed about a piece of my perfect fairy-tale life.  Does anyone else actually do this?  This is probably one of the major reasons I actually enjoy long, lonesome commutes. Aside from the serious dent they put in my bank account on a weekly basis, drives like this are my chance to listen to amazing country music and fantasize about my perfect, would-be life. 

While right now all of that is just fantasy, I hold on to my faith that one day, those fairy-tales and those reveries will come to life.  Until then, I will enjoy my single life and continue to spend my time with my amazing, eclectic mix of friends.  Besides, at 25 years old, I’m still pretty damn young.  

I once had a portion of the type of love portrayed in this movie with someone special, and there was a time when I thought that he was my true soul mate.  I guess God had a different plan in store.  And, I’m okay with that.

So for any ladies, or men, who might currently be in the same shoes as I, growing antsy because we haven’t yet found the one, our time will eventually come.  And I’ll be damn sure that one day, through prayer, patience, faith, and the grace of God, we will someday meet our very own endless love.  

Because I really do believe that soul mates exist. 

xoxo ~Elizabeth 

Calling all the single ladies... and men

In light of tomorrow’s national Hallmark Holiday looming upon us, I thought I might reflect on some of the thoughts provoked by Valentine’s Day. 

Ah, Valentine’s Day.  Probably one of the most beloved yet hated holidays of the year, I am willing to bet that many people, like I, have wrestled with hating and loving and hating and loving the holiday all over again. 

Before I begin to sound like the jealous cynic that I’ve so recently and admittedly often embrace, I will say that love is an incredible phenomenon.  

I mean, I’m not a Nicholas Sparks fanatic and hopeless romantic for shits and giggles.  I truly long for a happy, loving relationship portrayed in the books and the movies.  I want that fairytale love that often times seems so out of reach. And, I have been lucky enough to encounter some really amazing relationships in my past, but things obviously don’t always work out. 

Sometimes I guess my consistent high standards have played into my recent morphing of a dangerously jaded cynic. 

Alright… I’m not THAT bad.  I know that one day I’ll get my happy relationship because I know what I’m worth and I know what I deserve.  It just really sucks waiting sometimes when everyone else around you seems to be so ecstatically jumping for joy: swooning and screeching and blabbing about their perfect little love lives. 

 Or maybe they’re just blinded by “love” and infatuation. Who knows.  Whatever it is, I’m happy for those people.  They deserve to be happy.  But I’ll say it again.  When you look around and you’re the oddball out, it sucks.  It really, really sucks. 

So here we have Valentine’s Day: A National holiday socially created as the day to portray and profess our love for that special someone in our lives. This year I’m not part of the lucky bunch (*tear* *wahhh*), that is unless you count my father who literally kisses my face off (and yes, he really does kiss me so hard that my skin goes raw.  Let’s remember I’m 25; gotta love the old lad) and who will probably spoil my mom and I to a fancy-schmancy dinner and chocolate truffles afterward.   Okay, so I guess Valentine’s day isn’t SO bad this year. 

But now I can’t help but think about those lucky ladies who get spoiled with it all: candlelit dinner by the fireplace, rose petals lining the bath, flowers, chocolates, teddy bears, and, wait for it….

DIAMONDS. (Insert eye-roll)

If you’re one of those lucky girls, hats off to you! And kudos to the sucker you landed. He’s a keeper!  While I might often gag when I hear stories like this, it’s probably just because I’m jealous. So, ladies, you enjoy your romantic night with the lucky lad.  Seriously. 

But here’s my problem with Valentine’s Day. 

 DOUBLE. STANDARD. 

Why has so much of society adopted such a grandiose view of what Valentine’s Day is supposed to look like? I would much rather be surprised with some flowers sent to my work than the whole enchilada laid out from the minute I stepped foot in the door all the way to the bedroom.  Seriously, whoever does that has a lot of time on their hands.  Unless it’s a proposal…. By all means, go for it. 

I remember one year I told my boyfriend at the time not to bother wasting too much time and energy on Valentine’s Day because it really wouldn’t mean anything to me. 

“If you want to go all out, save it for a random Tuesday or something rather than Valentine’s Day.  It’ll mean so much more,” I explained to him.  

“Well won’t you be angry if I don’t get you anything at all?” he responded. 

He definitely had a point.  And that’s the double standard I’m talking about. 

“If you want to get me some flowers and chocolates or something like that, go for it.  I’ll be satisfied.  But telling me you love me every day sprinkled with some random acts of kindness is so much better than a grandiose performance on February 14^th.”  

And, he actually listened.  Flowers were delivered to my classroom where I was temporarily subbing with a simple “I love you” on the attached card.  The students really got a kick out of that.  And later that night, we spent the evening together at a nice restaurant and then cuddled up on the couch to watch movies after.  Nothing crazy; just sweet, simple, and fun boyfriend-girlfriend bonding time.  

And when a couple months later, on a random Tuesday (okay, maybe it was Thursday), I was surprised with flowers “just because” and a nice pair of jeans that I’ve been really wanting but my budget couldn’t afford, I was so much happier than if it had taken place on a Hallmark Holiday. 

So, I’m not bashing Valentine’s Day.  For those of you who have special plans, I really hope you have an amazing night because everyone deserves to be spoiled from time to time.  But let’s not forget to sprinkle random acts of love throughout the year to our special Valentine.  Don’t just save it all for February 14^th. 

Let’s make every day Valentine’s Day for the ones we love.  That is something to be admired.  That is special.  That, America, is true love.

And that doesn't just have to apply to romantic relationships either.  Let's show our mommies and daddies and grandparents, or whoever, how much we really love them.

And to all you single guys and gals out there, embrace it!  Your lucky lady or lad is out their somewhere.  Just have faith.  I'm right there with you.

So, Happy Valentines Day, everyone.  I "love" you all. 

~Elizabeth 

"Automatic"

I’m sitting here at my desk on a snow day from school and work, and I am only on my second article of my graduate homework when I’ve literally had the ENTIRE day to get ahead.  I don’t know what it is about this winter, but I just cannot seem to get into the groove of this graduate semester.  

But today, that’s okay.  Why?  

Because I just listened to Miranda Lambert’s new single, “Automatic,” for about the twenty-third time in a row.  

And I am happy. I am very happy. 

For one reason, I love Miranda Lambert and I love country music.  Music speaks volumes to me.  It is a passion of mine, and although I never pursued music like I wish I had, I connect to music and truly feel the raw emotion and inspiration so cathartically expressed by the artists.  

Miranda Lambert is probably one of my biggest idols in country music, if not my only true idol.  I have all of Miranda’s released albums and I do not think I’ve ever NOT liked one of her songs. 

That’s why, when “Automatic” was released today, I didn’t hesitate to listen to it the very first chance I got.  And of course, I loved it within the first ten seconds.  

If you have not heard the song, I highly suggest you do one simple thing.  Whether you are a country music fan or not, pull up Internet Explorer (or Safari or Firefox or whatever).  Type in YouTube in the URL address bar.  Type in Miranda Lambert automatic in the search bar.  Find the Audio file.  Click. Listen. And I mean, really, really listen.  Ponder it. Reflect.  Think.  Smile. Be happy. 

 The meaning behind the song is truly classic and just wonderful.  In fact, I sent the lyrics and a link to the song to my grandparents because I know they’ll appreciate this one. 

I think that’s why I love country music so much.  Not only is the music itself so engaging, captivating, moving, beautiful… but, coupled with the lyrics, the whole meaning of a song is artistically revealed and expressed.   Country music makes the world a better place.  It is so real.  So genuine.  So raw.  That’s something I always say, and I’m sure fans of other genres would just as willingly make the same claims about their favorite songs as well.  

But, let’s get back to “Automatic.” The song is about how life used to be “before everything became automatic.”  It speaks of the simple things that made life so wonderful: like putting quarters in a payphone, drying laundry on a line, rolling down windows—the kind with the cranks, recording music on a blank cassette, taking pictures with old cameras—you know, the kind where the picture would develop right out of the camera and we had to shake it for a clear picture to appear, writing letters and mailing them (did I not refer to this in my most recent blog about the genuine impression made on a hand written letter???) and then of course my favorite part—staying married meant working your problems out.  

And then the chorus really brings the entire song together:  “Hey whatever happened to waiting your turn and doing it all by hand?  Cuz’ when everything is handed to you it’s only worth the time put in.  It all just seems so good the way we had it, back before everything became automatic.”  

Now I know we live in a contemporary society that is ever evolving and technological advances make things seems so much more convenient.  And I’m not completely complaining. Technology and all these first world advancements can be really awesome and beneficial for normal routine responsibilities.  

On the contrary, however, societal evolution has also contributed to a lazy America.  If not that, we have come to rely on technology as a crutch for communication and other obligations.  

It was Albert Einstein who said “I fear the day that technology will surpass our human interaction. The world will have a generation of idiots.” I’m not saying that technology—or all evolutionary happenings in society—has completely contributed to a dumb or lazy America, but it’s definitely had a hand in the matter.  

I’m also not saying that we should do away with technology or contemporary advancements because it is in fact beneficial.  But sometimes I wonder what it would have been like to live more simply.  

We have a quote in our house that reads, “Live Simply, laugh often.”  I think we need to consider how special our parents and grandparents lives were in a more simple, less self-centered society. 

 I often hear my grandparents and others alike commonly claim something like this:

“Your grandmother and I grew up in a time that when something was broke, we fixed it.”  That saying goes for both materialistic things as well as the intangible.  And that’s relationships.  

My favorite part of this song is where Miranda sings “Staying married was on the way to work your problems out.”  We have evolved into a society where divorce and infidelity are all too common.  We are too lazy to communicate and work hard—truly make an effort—to solve relational problems.  

I know so many couples who, after one big fight, call it quits.  Where’s the love in that??  If we truly love our partners, our spouses, let’s stick to the vows we make at the alter before we are so quick to rush into a divorce.  

Let me quickly interject at this moment my disclaimer that I DO NOT, by any means, think all divorce is wrong.  In light of many ethical disasters and serious relational issues, I realize that divorce is often warranted and necessary regarding some particular circumstances.  However, I stand by my statements that, in some cases, divorce may often just become the easy way out of trivial or petty issues.  

And, even in a contemporary America, where everything has become so automatic, perhaps we should consider living simply—even among the advancements and commonalities all around us.  We might even learn to respect and love others, as well as ourselves, so, so much more.  

Live simply. Laugh often. Love deeply.  

~Elizabeth