Why attitude really counts

I'm sure it doesn't take a blog post from a random person like me to preach about the importance of leading a positive life.  But I've always found consistent reminders to be helpful in the daily endeavors to lead a happy life, hence the reason for this post. 

Several months ago when I had just begun blogging, some of my past posts had mentioned how I've morphed into a jaded cynic.  For a time I was quite cynical, and I adopted my own form of sarcasm that, although often found funny, was a result of anger, self-doubt, and loneliness. 

After some reflection and consideration, however, I made the choice one day that I was going to start being happy again and living a more positive, carefree life.  It was then when I was inspired to write my blog post titled "Why I've decided to let go and let God".   

When I made that choice (remember, happiness is a CHOICE), I knew I had to continue to stand by it.  Each day I said my prayers, thanked the good Lord for my blessings, and made continuous efforts to have a positive attitude.  And for some time, I was really content. 

I spent my time with like-minded people, spent more time with my parents and grandparents, looked at exercise as a reward rather than a chore, and consciously made efforts to smile around the people I was with.  And I really felt a difference.  I had a pep in my step and even my smile started looking different in pictures. 

And that's when I met my handsome dreamboat.  Perhaps my ecstasy toward my current relationship is a big reason for this post... I've been dating my boyfriend for three months, although it seems much longer, and this is the happiest I've been in a really long time.  He still gives me butterflies as if I'm seeing him all over again for the first time, and I try to treat every day as if I'm still trying to win him over.  He is so incredible, and I can't help but think, every single day, how truly lucky I am to be gracing his arm.  I thank the Lord for this blessing every day, and continually pray that He blesses our relationship. 

Although Gabriel is a major source of my current happiness, I realize that, as the old adage goes, "you can't be happy with someone else if you're not happy with yourself."  I wonder what things might be like if I had run into Gabe during my bout of depression and cynicism.  Would he have been attracted to me then? 

Something he often says to me is that he loves my positive attitude and how being around me makes him want to be a better person.  Funny, because I think he makes me a better person.  Now my motivation to be happy and positive is reinforced, not only for my own desires but for Gabriel as well. 

This is not meant to say that I don't have my bad days or bouts of pessimism. That's normal.   But instead of ruminating on the negative, I realize that a lot of things are out of my control.  So, if you've got to vent, then vent!  Get it out, but don't continuously ruminate the issue.  Get it out, take a breath, slap a smile on, and move on.  You'll be much happier you did in the long run.

I know a few people who are the way that I often used to be: incessantly angry, more negative than positive, and continuously pitying or doubting themselves.  Now being on the other end, I realize how unattractive it is, and I never want to be that way again.  While I do often struggle with self confidence (I have anxiety... I get it from my momma), I've realized that happiness breeds confidence.  Negativity, however, only breeds continuous negative thoughts. 

The choice to be happy doesn't always come easy because we all encounter some daily struggles or setbacks, but life would be so much easier and less stressful if everyone made a conscious effort to lead a positive lifestyle. The ability to be happy amidst adversity is a humbling, genuine experience. 

 A healthy and happy mind is a healthy and happy life.  And the chance to share that with a special someone (or someones) is truly rewarding. 

So, don't worry, be happy :)

~Elizabeth

"Mother Like Mine": A Tribute to my Momma

I remember the first time I heard this song.  I had made a quick trip to Target to buy The Band Perry’s newest album because I had liked the first one so much, and I just had to see for myself what the album “Pioneer” was all about after hearing the radio hosts raving about it. 

The radio, though, never seems to broadcast the other random songs placed on the album.  Unless you buy the artists albums, some really great singles never make it to the limelight to deserve its worthy public attention.  And this was one of them. 

Track 8 on the album, titled “Mother Like Mine” was one of those songs I instantly fell in love with from the moment I heard the first set of chords.  Without a second thought, I knew I wanted to dedicate this song to you one day.  (Click the link below for lyrics and video to this song).

http://youtu.be/XwuMfUjIBCc

It’d simply be easy to play the song for you, Momma, but there’s so much more to you than is explained in lyrics accompanied by the gorgeous string of chords and melody. I wanted to do something more, and I figured I explained myself best in my cathartic expression through writing.  I will explain to you, by delineating the bolded and italicized lyrics, why I think you’re the best Mother in the world—and I’m sure that goes for just about anyone and their own mommies.

So, this song is dedicated to you Momma; please know, however, that not even the incredible lyrics come close to explaining what you mean to me—and to all of us.

You, momma, are the sky that holds the clouds.  You are strong.  While you may often feel emotionally weak, I think you are one of the strongest women I know.  Amidst the face of adversity and grappling with some scary health issues, you’ve kept your chin up and still put the needs of others before your own.  I guess that is a natural part of motherhood, and I consciously strive to do the same in my daily endeavors. 

You are the lady of our house.  You do it all, Momma.  Cook, clean, laundry, landscaping, home improvement, teach, and more… Our home, our family, would have crumbled long ago without you. 

You’re the blind believer in all I dare to be.  I know many parents think they know what is best for their children, and while you and Dad have always made helpful suggestions, you’ve always supported my ultimate career goals and interests.  And even while it’s been a difficult journey and an often mental burden in the midst of a struggling economy, you continually tell me that I’m going to be the best damn professor this county’s ever seen.  For that, I am forever grateful. 

There’s no safer place I’ve found than the shoulder of your white night gown.  There is no age to determine when I will stop coming to my parents for a safe haven. Even in my own adult life, there are times when I just want to be held by you and Dad.  Life can really knock ya down sometimes, and there’s no place like home to confide in the comfort and protection of our moms and dads.  Okay, so your shoulder is a little bony, but there’s still no place I’d rather be J

I’ve got the best and the worst of you in me.  I really am a lucky girl.  While I don’t see much of a resemblance, the older I get, the more and more people tell me I look like you.  That’s a huge compliment I’d be happy to take any day.  You are beautiful, Momma; and not just on the outside.  You have the biggest heart of anyone I know, and you’re always putting others before yourself.  That is truly one of your most inspiring qualities.  And even amidst stubbornness, anxiety, and self-criticism, your altruism by far outweighs the latter traits—and I only hope I continue to irradiate half of that quality.    

I’d share you if I could…

So the wars would all be over. 
Cause you’d raise us all as friends. 
And no one would ever wonder
If somebody wanted them. 
We’d walk on grass that’s greener
And our cares would all be freer. 
If the world had a mother like mine. 

Need I say more?  I really do believe, momma, that the world would be a better place if everybody had a mother like you—a woman so giving, so kind-hearted, so selfless, so beautiful and inspiring is a gift not to be taken for granted.

Perhaps my favorite part of the song and the verse that describes you most, I just about cried when I heard it for the first time…

You’re our father’s one great love.  You’re the one he wanted most. I’ve probably asked Daddy to tell the story a hundred times about how he loved you when you were best friends growing up, and how he wanted to marry you but you were too stubborn to see it.  For a man to ask multiple times for your hand in marriage before you’d acquiesce—that’s patience.  That’s love.  And it really is an inspiring story.  I’m not sure if I know anyone else with a love so strong.  You are truly blessed, Momma.  Thank you for finally finding your brain, because had you not married Daddy, I obviously would not be here to be writing this blog about you.  And let's face it, I'm awesome. 

You’re the light in the window of the house I grew up in.  While I still live at home, I remember what it was like driving home on the weekends from college, or coming over for dinner or a random visit when I had been living with Amy for some time. Metaphorically, “going home” meant so much more than seeing mommy and daddy.  It was my safe haven—my place to escape when things got a little too tough, when life had me worried, or whenever I might have felt lonely.  And although you and Dad have discussed moving to a Lake House for the past 10 years now (I’m not sure this is EVER going to happen), home will always be a home to me.  I will always remember walking through the front door and smelling the aroma of fresh-baked apple pie and lasagna—or turkey—on a big holiday.  I’ll forever cherish the times when I come home from work, plop down my bags (I know, I know… take it up to my room) and say, “Momma, are you ready to go workout?!” There’s something about working out with you gives me a motivational boost to stay in shape.  Thank you for reinforcing the importance of health and wellness. My Gosh, with your cooking, it’s a miracle I’m not 500 pounds. 

You take the midnight call; you’re the bravest of us all.  Literally, you do take the midnight call.  I guess I’ll never understand what it’s like to be a parent until I am lying wide awake in bed wondering when my kids will be home.  And while you might not think so, I really do believe you’re extremely brave. I remember when Daddy was in the hospital and had to undergo risky surgery. I never once saw you cry.  I know you must have when you were alone, but you were emotionally and physically strong when everybody else was weak.  You were, and always will be, our emotional rock. 

You sing in the garden that you let your hair down in.  I know that I’ve often grown tired and weary and, at times extremely annoyed, while you sang and whistled and hummed in the kitchen while I was trying to sleep or do my homework, but there’s something so serene about you singing in the garden.  When you work your magic in the garden, you emanate a beautiful aura that nobody can dismiss.  It really is enthralling.

Oh the wars would all be over
'Cause you’d raise us all as friends
And no one would ever wonder just how much you wanted them
We'd walk on grass that's greener
And the dishes would all be cleaner (Yes, they would literally be cleaner)
If the world had a mother like mine

When I reflect upon the lyrics in these versus and the chorus, I am truly inspired as subsided memories emerge to consciousness.  And I’m sorry that it often takes an inspiring moment or a captivating song to remind me just how lucky I am to have a Mother like you.  I can only hope that I’ve made you extremely happy and proud, and while I know children can be a real pain in the royal ass, I vow to make every day an endeavor to show you just how much I love you—if even in the simplest ways. 

I am so proud to call you my Momma—and the very same applies to Grandma, because you obviously got it from her.  And just as anyone might say about their own family, I truly have the BEST parents and grandparents in the world—and not even an account as such transpired through writing can justify how much you truly mean to me. 

Thank you for being my rock, my teacher, my friend, my comfort, my inspiration, and most of all, my MOTHER.  I love you to the moon and back. 

Happy Mother’s Day, to you, and to all mommies deserving of our love.   

                                                                                                                           With all my love,

                                                                                                                       Elizabeth (Your Little Bits)

 

Thinking of our Mommies

With Mother’s Day soon approaching, I thought I might take the time to truly reflect upon the inspiring qualities of our mothers and grandmothers.  As an annual holiday, it is simple to quickly go to the store, pick up a card and maybe some flowers, and be done with the gift.  I’ve done it several times.  I get it.  Life gets in the way, we get busy, and several days ahead of time we remember, “Oh crap, Sunday is Mother’s Day.  I better go pick something up sometime soon.”  Or, we send out the mass text message to our siblings to see what joint project we might be able to pitch in on.

Is this pretty accurate for everyone else?  Or am I the only one? 

This is not at all to say that I forget to appreciate my mother or grandmother, but with the goings-on of life, it’s easy to forget the annual holiday.  Or rather, perhaps we just store it in our subconscious minds, bringing it to awareness at the last minute. 

I wrote a post about Valentine’s Day a couple months ago and discussed how it has seemingly become a forced Hallmark Holiday—a day where we’ve come to expect extravagant gifts or overly-planned expressions of love.  Has Mother’s Day and Father’s Day essentially become the same? 

I do not think that this is the case, because our parents definitely deserve to be honored and nationally recognized for everything that they’ve done for us.  However, like the Valentine’s Day post, it is of the utmost importance to express that appreciation all year, and not just save it all up for the chosen date on the calendar. 

Again, these notions are not meant to assume that nobody appreciates their mommies (and daddies) year round, but think about how special it would be for a Mother to receive a gift or an act of kindness on any random day throughout the year.  “Just because” moments like this seem to really tug at the heart strings more often than a gift that’s expected. 

Nonetheless, a nationally recognized Holiday to honor our mothers (and fathers) is undeniably well-deserved.  But this year on Mother’s Day I am making a vow to my amazing mother. 

I promise to make it known to you, mom, year round, how much I appreciate you, how much I love you, and how my life would be nothing without you. 

And in honor of my mother (and grandmother) and all other mommies out there, thank you for everything, large and small, that you’ve ever done for your children: 

1. Thank you for always cooking us healthy meals and making our bellies happy.  God knows we could never match your mad kitchen skills. Even at 25 years old, I still call home with a rumbling belly asking “what’s for dinner?” 

2. Thank you for doing the laundry.  I don’t know how many clothes I would have ruined if I had to do my own laundry growing up. I know it’s not difficult, but mommies just seem to always do it best. 

3. Thank you for sewing all my clothes and for being so crafty by sprucing up my room.  I do wince a bit though when you tell me I’m domestically challenged.  Give me a break.  High school cut the Home-Ec classes.  That was a big mistake. 

4. For your loving and nurturing quality, thank you for being our emotional rock. 

5. Thank you for driving me to school, sporting events, or other extra-curricular activities or commitments during my teen years. 

6. Thank you for sitting through all those sporting events and extra-curricular activities.  As a coach, I now see how exhausting that must have been for you every single weekend. 
 
7. Thank you for listening to us ramble, complain, or tattle-tale about other kids in school.  I see now how annoying that must have been day in and day out.

8. Thank you for teaching me about God and the Bible, and for raising me with proper morals and values. 

9. Thank you for supporting my education and career path.

10. Thank you for teaching me the importance of exercise.  I never actually thought that exercise would be a priority and a “reward” in my adult life.  As a child, it just seemed like a chore.  Thanks for reinforcing how important it is for health and wellness. 

11. Thank you for singing me to sleep when I was little, and now, for singing along with me to my favorite songs.  Even though I just can't figure out harmony.  Obviously, I was not blessed with that quality of yours.  Argh...

12. Thank you for “attempting” at teaching me how to drive your jeep wrangler, despite the fact I still can’t drive a stick shift to this day.

13. Thank you for helping us on challenging school/work projects. Sometimes a little maternal inspiration is just the boost we need to tackle the hard parts. 

      For everything and more, thank you mommies (and grand-mommies).  We couldn’t have made it without you.  We love you to the moon and back. 

       Personal blog posts specifically addressed to my mother and grandmother coming soon...  

      Have a fabulous Mothers Day weekend!  

        ~Elizabeth