Lately I've been coming across articles and other blog posts on the Facebook News feed about things that make women happy or reasons why men don't understand women: you know, the typical, lighthearted, and comedic expressions of how men and women are so drastically different (although I don't think this is always the case) and the step-by-step guides for pleasing your significant other. They were quick and enjoyable reads, motivating me to put my own spin on the topic.
This topic is relevant to me because my life is much different than it was several months ago. I changed my attitude and outlook on life, and shortly after I met my incredibly handsome boyfriend. His physique is just the cherry on top of the cake. He is a sweet, genuine, humble family man with a strong value system, and he inspires me to be a better person every day. I know it's only been a few months so I know not to get too far ahead of myself, especially since a lot can change over time. But so far, he does a damn good job of making a lady happy.
One day in a moment of girlish, giddy reverie after spending time with my boyfriend, I thought about the articles on Facebook I had stumbled upon and what it is that women really want. Although I have to admit that most of what was written was (hilariously) spot on, I couldn't help but think that it sends a false impression that women want a guy who meets every single criteria on their checklist. And then I thought, "Gosh, do I do that?! Do I succumb to this?"
Perhaps it's a subconscious thing, but it seems to me that quick snap judgments regarding desired qualities is the norm when getting to know someone for the first time.
Although not ideal, I think we are all somewhat guilty of this--at least when it comes to looks. Is he tall? Cute? Athletic? Buff?
And by God if someone doesn't meet our physical standards we generally write off the poor schmuck as a non-potential date. While I suppose that looks do get the dating ball rolling, let's remember that looks fade, and sometimes, they van be deceiving. I mean, we've all dated some really hot guys who just turned out to be complete assholes. Am I right??
So this brings me back to reflect upon those articles I read about the qualities women desire in their gents. One of the articles talked about constant pursuit, and that's probably got to land at the top, if not near the top, of my list.
Women like to be pursued. Just because a guy's finally got her, doesn't mean he has to stop trying. I know so many married women who say the spark has died down in their relationship because neither of the spouses do much of anything for each other or the relationship lacks affectionate communication. Ladies like to feel special, so keep acting like you're trying to win her over for the first time. Keep the compliments coming and don't discount the little things. We're not asking for much. You don't have to buy our love. Hell, you really don't have to buy anything if you've got half a creative mind. It's the small random acts of kindness that really go a long way.
If a guy's really putting in effort to keep a smile on our face, it makes him that much more attractive. If we're lucky enough to hold on to a guy for years or a lifetime, any random acts of kindness keep the relationship flames burning.
So what might be some RAKs (Random Acts of Kindness) that are really special and don't cost any money? For starters....
A nice massage. It doesn't even have to be a legit massage. Women like to be touched, so just something as simple as running your hand down her arm or on her leg says you care about her.
Keep the kisses comin'. Not just on the lips, but the cheeks, head, hand, and neck.
We like to hear sweet things. So even if you're chillin' on the couch with your girl, turn and look at her, and tell her she looks beautiful. Or, compliment her on her talents and hard work. Better yet, do both.
Cook dinner. It doesn't have to be fancy, but a guy who cooks for his girl obviously cares about her.
Get her flowers. You don't have to buy 'em either. Pick some nice daisies along the side of the road by your house. It's the thought about making her smile more so than the flowers themselves. Or, if you're not a flowers-kind-of-guy, women love being surprised with other things, too. Frame that nice picture you took at the game last week, or bring home a nice perfume sample that was being promoted in the lobby area at your office.
It really isn't that hard to keep a smile on your lady's face. Unless she's one of those criteria-checking Godzilla's, you should earn an A+ for your constant pursuit. Think about it. Girls like to do nice things for their guys, so they obviously want it in return as well. Men and women don't really have to be that difficult to figure out.
Just keep the lines of communication open and the RAK's consistent.
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